Incandescent Freedom:
Let your light so shine... and warm you!
In view of tyranny, we must adopt a solution bringing us some relief from it.
There are χ-million air conditioners in this country, of which ω = χ-ε units waste energy only because of human vanity.
The
extremity of wastefulness is manifested by this megalo-wattish atrocity, yet
goes completely ignored.
The so-called CONGRESS is devoted to imposing its lack of wisdom on us as if it were in fact an ALL KNOWING BODY OF GENIUSES; and it
is because of this gross importunity that we have the recent legislation regarding the use of incandescent light bulbs which has as its
sole purpose to seize our 'baby rattle' and to smash it before our eyes,
demoralizing and disappointing us for life, and for the entire
course of posterity.
Since nobody consigned during summertime by the "hangman's noose" (or 'tie', as it is commonly called) to hang by his collar drenched in
the sweat of his underarms generated by the BTUs of heat energy confined within the constraints of his suit-jacket could ever be expected
to give up the life-support system which 'conditions' his 'air', we obviously aren't going to be able to convince these pompous candidates
for deification (i.e., the 'Congress') that they're any closer to heaven without the air conditioners. And the world will eventually go
to hell in spite of all the air conditioners, and as Malcolm Forbes well knew, their extension cords must needs be very, very long to be
able to reach down there.
So why don't they save us the trouble of giving up our incandescent bulbs and just eliminate all of the excessive dependency and physiological
habituation or addiction to air conditioning, which would certainly reduce the nation's energy consumption (in both stationary and moving
contexts) by a significant amount?
Well... They're
afraid of hell, and don't want to think about it or to be reminded of it, even if they profess not to believe that it exists.
So - What's the plan?
1. Continue to manufacture incandesent bulbs just as we have been doing.
2. Label the product "Light-emitting Heating Unit".
3. Rate the output of heat in BTUs along with the output of light in lumens.
With this strategic manoeuver, we should be able to satisfy the needs of any purchaser of our commodity, provided no blasted tyrant
who thinks himself GODD or MISTER GODD tells us NO NO NO NO NO ... (and so on ad infinitum).
So, what's my interest, as the author of this bit of prosaic 'Malleus Maleficarum' on the topic of light bulbs? My answer to that
is as follows:
When I was stuck through one winter living in a room sandwiched between two lunatics who deprived me of proper heating
in the room I lived in and studied or did schoolwork in, I could not afford to pay for an electric heater or to pay
for the power to heat the room with it; and I was forced to use a 100-Watt light bulb in a small table lamp I had to
provide the warmth I needed to keep from catching cold or something.
I placed the lamp under my writing desk, and covered the air spaces at the sides of the desk with a blanket, which
I wrapped around my legs and torso so that the warmer air trapped beneath the desk which arose from that incandescent
light bulb would at least warm me up some before escaping through the blanket into the room or be absorbed by the
desk.
This was sufficient to keep me from becoming seriously ill; and I avoided those lunatics (who professed to be devil
worshippers) as well because I was able to stay in my room and not go out of it. And I didn't have to spend a lot
of money running a 1000-Watt electric heater, either. The 100-Watt light bulb did well enough.
And if I were in a position where a furnace had gone out and I still had electricity from some source, I could just as
well use an incandescent light bulb as a heater as well as a light, and save my own or someone else's life.
Such considerations as these lead me to say,
Nuts to you all. You are the sons of Hell to use the law as a bludgeon as you do!
Your psychological violence is bludgeoning the conscience of the entire United States of America to death!
That's what I think of you, Congress: You are
psychological murderers. You don't kill a man's body; you kill his mind, and his
soul.